Be Mature, This is Formal Oral.

I’ll put my hands up and admit it, occasionally I will laugh when particular emphasis is placed on the word oral in a classroom. Some people laugh at the result 69% in an exam, but sniggering at the word oral is my dirty little secret. However that doesn’t mean I’m going to discard it as a Chelsea centre-half discards his marriage. Sorry, like a Chelsea defender discards their marriage, that makes more sense. I had an epiphany last week, a good oral puts you on the road to a decent grade, and it’s lying there for the taking like an unguarded Trocaire box (I’ve never stolen, it’s purely an expression). 25% right? It’s around there anyway, correct me if I’m wrong.

Personally, I lick my lips at the thought of a nice bit’a oral in the cramped room in my school where they’re carried out. Not because it’ll be easy and effort-free however, because of course you can carry out your oral without killing yourself, but to reap the benefits, work needs to be put in. I’m lucky however, as I’ve always had a knack for the oral.

I sit down and flirt, charm, or man up if necessary, and have a right auld chat with the cupla focail en Francais that I know and come out delighted as the examiner just smiled at me and smiled at me and smiled at me. I can tell that the examiner enjoyed sucking the sentences out of me like Paris Hilton would enjoy testing Christiano Ronaldo’s Portuguese native tongue. Of course after last year I now realise that for all the beaming and confidence, you can’t beat knowledge.

To be fair I did get decent grades in mock orals, it was about the only thing I scored moderately acceptably at in honours Irish last year. But needless to say I still failed, and it goes without saying that had I practiced my oral beforehand, I wouldn’t be typing here. Of course there are questions I wouldn’t have been able to answer even if Seachtain na nGaeilge was named after me, such as what did I think about Davy Fitzgerald bringing his Waterford hurlers to a Bernard Dunne fight the night before a league game in Parnell Park after I told the examiner that I enjoyed shtick an’ ball. However I could’ve whipped out all these impressive, lengthy sentences when asked the simple questions, and that would’ve made my E a D3! Oh well, c’est la vie.

As for French, it’s very much the same. Learn, practice, and sweet Jesus if you don’t know you’re document well don’t bring one into the interrogation! I do think that sums French up.

Will I be kind and explain how TG4 and TV5 do wonders for your Irish and French respectively? Go’wan sure why not, I can’t say I’ve studied off it but I know some people recommend it. Plus, Irish is pretty shit cool nowadays innit. And we should aim to do well in it, it’s part of our culture. And as for French, that’s pretty out of this world too de nos jours oui? Learn some phrases from those and I’m sure you can throw them in to woo the examiner.;) Don’t be a Snorlax, I’m sure Annah would agree.

And remember the person opposite to you doesn’t want you to fail, they’re wicked nice, and it would only delight them to give you a great grade, and thus a great start for the written paper come June.

Oh and apologies, I’m after forgetting about the minority languages, so this one’s for the Bundesrepublik Deutschland.

Fine I’ll be honest, I was just looking for an excuse to play that. But in all seriousness don’t undermine the importance of orals. Now let the innuendos and immature jokes commence!:) What’s with the word knob-rowing in Sliocht 1?:P;)

Merci Beaucoup agus Slan.