Our last ever Easter holidays of secondary school (assuming no repeaters but I guess no-one plans to repeat, right?). It feels a little funny. Like I should be freaking out or studying hermit style, whatever. I am far too complacent at the moment. Seemed to have adopted this odd “it’ll be grand” attitude. I know in some ways it’s better to be this way, more accepting and open to all sorts of results but still… shouldn’t I have some fire under me or something?
I’ve been annoying myself with my study as of late. Does anybody out there have the solution to “fidgety study”? You know.. it’s when you open up one subject, start a question, are about 5% into it when you go, “blah!” and change subjects? I do that quite often, especially with Business Studies and anything to do with Irish Paper two. Help, please.
I half suspect that my indecision regarding my future career is something to do with the fact I’m not driving myself crazy chasing every A1. To quote from MacBeth himself,
” I have no spur to prick the sides of my intent, but only vaulting ambition, which o’erleaps itself, and falls on the other. ”
I am lacking in “vaulting ambition” due to the hazy fuzzy picture I see when I think of next year. I can’t see myself in college. Not at all.. Scary stuff this change is really. I really have to sort out my head and get my CAO figured out.
Easter holidays… oh my, how times flies. Trying to think though, I have no idea how I passed the Easter holidays of 1st to 4th years. Not a clue. Can’t have been that exciting. So at least now I can say, yes I am doing something, making memories. After all, if I get knocked down by a car tomorrow, pv=nrt or the above MacBeth quote isn’t going to be much good to me is it?
Can anybody else just feel summer coming up around the corner, the idea of being able to spend days doing whatever I want, reading something that isn’t government approved, wearing something that isn’t convent approved, sleeping hours that are socially unacceptable.. I can’t wait. I keep making more and more summer plans for myself. It’s wonderful. Albeit I am now left looking at my calender wondering how exactly I’m going to break it to work… Ouchy.
I have nine days left before Stockholm. Nine days to study my little socks off and to start chasing those better grades.. I can do it, I want to do it so really all I have to do is… do it!
Until next time,