It’s nearly December? Why was I not informed?

So there I was, stretched out on the couch, remote in hand, resting after a long day of pretending to work, when an ad for the Toy Show of all things comes on. I thought it was some sort of cruel hoax at first, or people were just getting ridiculously early about celebrating Christmas. It does get earlier every year in fairness, we’ll probably be putting up our trees the week after Easter soon enough. But no, according to anybody I asked, it’s  that time of year again.  As well as a chance to see 12 year olds from Cavan ruin the Beatles forever , and Tubs grin awkwardly in his ‘festive jumper’, the Toy Show means Christmas. Which also means that we’re halfway through the school year, and I’ve wasted precious weeks thinking that I had all the time in the world. It just doesn’t compute, seriously. Either we skipped a month or I went into hibernation around mid October. Only rational explanation I have anyways.

The weeks have all sort of merged together in one monotonous blur. Like a montage scene from a bad 80s movie, without the kick ass inspirational music. That’s why I haven’t been blogging much, nothing is happening. I’ve just been going through the days on autopilot, not noticing how many are sneaking past me. And now, the Christmas exams are starting in 2 weeks I think. Do. Not. Want.  Its almost comical, how underprepared I am. I’m getting lazier and lazier as time goes on, I’m pretty sure it’s supposed to go the opposite way. I haven’t done my Maths homework in about two months, and will probably continue in this vein for as long as I can get away with it.  I spend most of Biology class watching the antics of the crows outside the window, and most of English wondering why my teacher doesn’t just buy cardigans with buttons, thus eliminating the need to stop and pull them around herself every 5 minutes. Anything except actually listening, pretty much. I have the attention span of a 4 year old child who’s spotted a shiny object nearby and that’s probably being generous. I had my parent teacher meeting a couple of weeks ago, and my Accounting teacher said I had the ‘best capability for daydreaming’ she’s ever seen. I was actually pretty proud of that, might as well admit it.

It’s all coming back to bite me now though, because I’ve realised that I don’t remember anything I’ve been taught in the past couple of months. And still I’m not doing anything about it. Today was supposed to be an epic study day. I was gonna cram, like a ledge. Like a boss, even.  But no. I decided I had to clean my room first. Including my wardrobe, because everyone knows you can’t  reach your full academic potential if all your jeans aren’t neatly folded.  I made that last most of the morning, then I wrote a paragraph for the essay on Nazi Germany since I’ve been writing since mid-September sometime. Then I decided all that hard work warranted a half ton of chocolate and maybe just a few minutes of TV. That was at 2 o clock and I’m still here. This is getting beyond ridiculous. I have to do something now. I have to. Yeah, I’m going. I mean it this time. *80s inspirational music*

Bye kids!